you are umbrella?

On this lovely winter day,
I have decided to talk about one of my pet peeves:
when people don't know how to use "a" verses "an".....or "your" verses "you're."
I'm not going to lie.
If I am browsing through my Facebook or Instagram, and I see someone say something like,
(example 1) "I took my kids to the zoo and they got to pet a elephant."
or
(example 2) "Your awesome."....
that person immediately loses all of the 100 intelligence points that I subconsciously give everyone.
I assume everyone is intelligent until proven otherwise.
It just really annoys my inner English nerd.
Don't worry. If you use those words incorrectly, or you know someone who uses them incorrectly, I have 2 simple rules that are sure to clear up any confusion.

a vs. an
If a word begins with vowel, use "an"....if it doesn't start with a vowel, use "a".
And you're gold.
...an apple...
...an egg...
...an igloo...
...an octopus...
...an umbrella...
The only word I can think of that doesn't go by this rule is: uterus. It's a uterus...not an uterus. Weird.

your vs. you're
Rule? I don't know.Your is possessive and you're means YOU ARE. That apostrophe takes out the "a" and joins the two words and saves you a millionth of a second when you're talking/typing.
SO when you're (you are) typing a sentence...before you insert one of these two words....say it out loud before you post it.
You're (you are) awesome? Your awesome? ...YOU'RE AWESOME!
Your umbrella? You're (you are) umbrella? YOUR UMBRELLA!

So now that you know the rules, if Adi and I see you use the wrong one, we're going to look at you and laugh like this...

That little love just woke up from her nap, so this mommy's got to go!