1.24.2012

Super Powers!

Growing up, I always thought that my mom had super powers. Here are some examples:
1. She could make a regular pb&j sandwich taste like heaven...and when I made the same sandwich, it tasted NOTHING like hers.
2. She could find anything in under 5 seconds. I could have been looking for something for hours and when she would ask me what I was looking for, BAM, here it is!
3. Whenever I was sick, she could make me feel so much better by just being in the same room with me.

 There are many other powers she possessed, but these 3 have always stuck out in my mind.  I thought that she gained the powers from being a mom....but I have recently realized that I may have these powers as well, and I am not a mom. Where do these powers first come from? Maybe they start appearing before that...maybe some of them start appearing after you get married, too!

Example number one. I can make a simple turkey sandwich for Tyler, and he always says it tastes so much better when I make it.  Could it be because he enjoys not having to make his own sandwich?....or is it because I have the magic touch?  I'm going to go with option number 2...because it makes me feel good...AND because the phrase "go make me a sandwich, woman!" has a bad stereotype attached to it...and I prefer not to think that my husband believes all that crap :D However, if he starts saying that the popcorn tastes better when I make it....I may rethink this :)

Next example. When Tyler is getting ready for work, he usually says "Where are my keys?" "Where is my watch?" etc, etc.  Even if I haven't seen the object he is looking for, I find it in record time! This is followed by,"YOU'RE THE BEST BABE!" How do I find these things? I have no idea.  Maybe I had seen the missing object before and forgotten...maybe....but I prefer to think this, too, is a super power beginning to show itself!

Last example.  Poor Tyler has been sick for 3 days now.  He NEVER gets sick...only on rare occasion.  As I have been taking care of him, guess what he has said to me numerous times??? "You make me feel better by just being here with me."  NO WAY! Another power??? This one really makes me feel awesome, since my passion is nursing, it makes my day to hear him say that.  Could it be that he is just trying to be all mushy and sweet?....maybe...or maybe I really do have the power to make him feel better with just my presence alone!  Again, I am going to go with option number 2:) 


What I have learned from this: Either I am turning into superwoman or I have an awesome husband who is wanting me to feel like superwoman. I like the sound of option number one!

1.20.2012

WHAT'S IN MY SHOE?!

Meet our "son" BayLee :) He is, in our opinion, the best dog in the entire universe.  If I believed in reincarnation, I would definitely be convinced that he was a human in his previous life.  He walks places on his hind legs, he hugs you, he actually likes wearing his clothes (and helps put them on by putting his paws in the holes for me), he gets hurt feelings (and lets you know he has hurt feelings), he sits  up like a human, and so many other things that are pretty cute/creepy.
We know that BayLee is helping prepare us for kids one day.
By observing the way Tyler is with BayLee, I've decided that Tyler is going to be the parent who has the mushy heart. 
When BayLee needs to be put in his kennel (doggie time out) or when he needs to be brushed  (BayLee does NOT like it), or anything else that may cause him to have hurt feelings, I end up doing, because Tyler doesn't want Baylee to "hate" him.  Since I do all of these things, I thought for sure that Tyler was his favorite. I thought that until Sunday night... and Monday morning.... :)

On Sunday night, I was watching TV with BayLee curled up beside me.  Tyler walked by us and BayLee went crazy.  He jumped off of the chair and started growling and barking.  The barking was a mean bark, and it was obvious that he wasn't playing.  Tyler would try to walk toward him so he could pet him but he would back up, and growl even louder.  After that, BayLee wanted nothing to do with Tyler the rest of the night. (We still have no idea why BayLee was mad at him!) We all got in bed, and normally, BayLee sleeps right in between us...but that night, he slept on the edge of my side of the bed as far away from Tyler as he could get.  We got up the next morning and I ironed Tyler's work clothes while he got ready.  I got back in bed and went to sleep.  About 15 minutes later, I woke up to Tyler saying (in a very not-so-happy voice) "WHAT IS IN MY SHOE!?!"  BayLee casually jumped off the bed and left the room.  What do you mean what's in your shoe? "I just stuck my foot in my shoe and my sock is SOAKING WET!" Babe...I bet BayLee peed in it....he was pretty ticked off at you last night. "No, he wouldn't do that...he's never done anything like that."  I watched Tyler as he took off his wet sock and put it up to his nose.  "IT IS PEE!"  That was probably the most upset I have ever seen Tyler.....and while I watched him sniff his pee soaked sock I pictured BayLee peeing in his shoe.  I got so tickled...because it was so obvious that he had done it out of spite.  I tried to hold back my laughter but I couldn't.  I laughed so hard that my eyes started to water.  I looked over at Tyler.  He was looking back at me.  He wasn't laughing. ".....babe...it's not funny...these are new shoes!" I managed to stop laughing long enough for Tyler to take his socks off, throw them down, forcefully exhale, leave the room (hopefully to wash his foot), come back, put a different pair of socks and shoes on, and leave for work.  After he left I took BayLee out (in case he to pee some more) and when we got back in the house, I kneeled down to talk to him. He sat down in front of me and put his paw on my hand.  I said "BayLee, you shouldn't have peed in daddy's shoe...that was bad...you know where you need to go." He licked my hand, stood up, and trotted happily into his kennel. He knew he was in trouble, but he didn't seem to mind the punishment. I'm pretty sure he was pleased with what he had done. I got the shoe out of the bedroom and attempted to salvage it.  I took the sole out (thankfully it was rubber) and washed it off..and since the shoe wasn't real leather, I washed the shoe.  Then I dried them, covered them with baking soda and sat them outside.  A few hours later I brought the pieces inside and put the shoe back together.  All of that happened on Monday.  Tyler wore the shoes on Thursday....nothing was said about any odor of urine....but it's very cold here....and I'm hoping the pee doesn't start to show itself when the weather warms up!

What I've learned from this: 1.  If your husband sticks his foot in a pee soaked shoe...and pulls his foot out with a pee soaked sock....be sympathetic and don't laugh...but you can laugh as much as you want when he leaves :)
2. Maybe Tyler isn't the favorite :D
                               

1.13.2012

Easy on the Information-MaryJophus

(When you read this post, you're going to wonder how I made it this far in life. Seriously.)

I lived 19 years without knowing Tyler and he lived 23 years without knowing me.  We have known each other for 2 years and 7 months, now...and even though we know a lot about each other, it's going to take a lot longer than 2 years and 7 months to know EVERYTHING about each other.  It could literally take forever to tell someone every detail of every story of your life.  I learn something new about Tyler every day and so far, nothing I have learned has scared me (too bad) or made me look at him and think, "Who did I marry?":)

Tonight, however, my husband heard a story of my life that was completely new to him...and while laughing at me he definitely thought, "oh no."

We were at my grandparent's house with my parents.  I'm not even sure how this story came up...and to be completely honest, I'm amazed that my family waited this long before they shared it with Tyler. 
Before I share this story with you I just want to say that I am still, to this day, extremely embarrassed when the story is told. ha.

When I was a baby, EVERY time they got me out of the bath my parents would drape the towel over my head like a hood and wrap the rest around my body and say, "Aw you look like MaryJophus!" This routine continued until I was able to take baths by myself.  Are you wanting to know who MaryJophus is? Don't worry, by the end of this blog you will know exactly who they are.
As I got older and was able to understand what they were saying, I put the pieces of the MaryJophus puzzle together and figured out who they were. I knew that Jesus' earthly mother was Mary and that His earthly father was Joseph...so it only made sense that with a name like MaryJophus the person HAD to be from Bible times... And since they only said I looked like them when the towel was draped over my head, it SCREAMED Bible times even more...it made perfect sense.  MaryJophus was there when Jesus was born...duh!  Since I solved the puzzle, I never asked my parents about it. He just wasn't mentioned in the Bible, no biggie.
Fast forward about 6 years. I was 12 going on 13 years old.  I was in a store with my mom around Christmas time.  We were walking around the store and I saw some statues.  One was of a manger scene, one was of a cross, one was of Jesus, and one was of....oh my goodness...it couldn't be...one was of MaryJophus! It was statue of a person from the shoulders up with what looked like a Bible times towel draped on it's head. Yes. Definitely MaryJophus. I decided to share my discovery with my mom, so I pointed at the statue and yelled across the aisle, "Hey mom! LOOK! IT'S MARYJOPHUS!" For some reason, everyone around me started laughing.  My mom walked over and she started laughing too..."What mom?" She thought I was kidding. "Why would I be kidding?" She thought I was making fun of our joke.  "What joke?" With look of horror my mom realized that I was an extremely literal person and that I had no idea that MaryJophus was just a silly little made-up name.  She explained to me that they just called me that to be silly. Well that was nice. At this point, I knew why everyone around me had laughed.  The statue I pointed at was supposed to be of Mary...but it didn't look like the normal Mary.  This was probably one of the most embarrassing moments of my life.
I was almost 13 years old and I legit thought that MaryJophus was at Jesus' birth.  I mean, don't you have him in your Christmas nativity scene?  You don't have the creepy guy peeking around the corner of the manger? Oh. I must be the only one that has that piece.

What I've learned from this: If your husband doesn't run away when he hears stories about some pretty unintelligent moments in your life...it's a good sign, right? Right :)

1.10.2012

A baby for a burger

First of all, our church started a church-wide 21 day fast this past sunday.
Second of all, a lot of my friends are having babies.
You may be asking yourself, "what in the world do those two things have in common?"
 Last night Tyler was watching football and during this time, I received a text message telling me that one of my friends was on her way to the hospital to have her baby.  Before we got married, Tyler and I agreed that we wanted to be married a few years before we had any babies (unless God has different plans, and if so, we're perfectly ok with that)....Since Tyler completely zones out when he watches football, I decided to mess with him a little.  I sat down beside him and said "babe...everyone is having babies....I want a baby." I was expecting him to look at me with a surprised/worried face and say something like "Autumn...whoa...pump your brakes!" Instead, I was the one with the surprised/worried face when he, without even making eye contact responded with, "I'll give you a baby if we can go get McDonald's."  This is where the significance of the fast comes into play.
After his response and a few minutes of silence, we both started laughing hysterically.  In reality, he probably responded that way because I know we can't get McDonald's, therefore, the baby isn't a possibility...but still...it freaked me out!
This is what I have learned from this experience:
DO NOT mess with my husband when he is sacrificing food...because when he is extremely hungry, he is apparently craving a McDonald's cheeseburger...and he may agree to anything for that cheeseburger.

1.04.2012

The first one!

I have a few facebook friends that have blogs, and I have always admired them.  I always thought it would be awesome to have a blog of my own...but I could never "find the time." I finally realized that I would never start a blog of my own if I waited to "find the time"...because that is an unrealistic saying. So, I've decided to MAKE time to have a blog of my own...and I'm pretty excited about it.



I got married on August 6, 2011 and it has been an awesome (almost) 5 months.  I've already learned a lot about being married and I can't wait to keep learning.  Like it says in my about me, I was (and still am) so excited to be Mrs. Tyler Ingram and to be a wife.  Mrs. has a much bigger definition than just being married and if you think about it, there is A LOT of difference between the Mrs. who has been married for 50 years, 20 years, 10 years, 5 years...and the Mrs. who has been married for 5 months:) Therefore, this blog is about my life: me learning new things, discovering new things, and laughing about things.


Here are some examples of some funny things that have happened since I became Mrs. Tyler Ingram:
1. We went on a cruise to the Bahamas and while on the cruise, I developed HORRIBLE hives that lasted almost 2 days.  This resulted in us having to go to the medical center on the ship about 6 times and me having to get numerous shots from an extremely scary nurse.  She scared us to death which resulted in Tyler thinking that my throat was going to swell shut in my sleep and that I was going to die....although he didn't express this fear, he also didn't sleep at all those 2 nights. He stayed up, watched me breathe, and woke me up every 15 minutes to make sure I was still alive..haha..bless his heart. We laugh a lot about that now.

2. I caught an extremely hot skillet on fire by drizzling oil in it. Before you get too "omg, she didn't know not to do that?" I would like to add that we got this cool glass oil drizzler at one of our showers...and I wanted to use it...I'm sure someone had told me at some point not to put oil in a hot skillet...and I promise that after I looked around to see my skillet engulfed in HUGE flames, I remembered.  So I ran outside with the flaming skillet and handed it to Tyler...while he was laughing really really hard.

3. Most recently (2 days ago) I was making cookies and was in a hurry.  I grabbed a small mixing bowl and put my stick of butter in it so I could melt it a little in the microwave. I put the bowl in the microwave for 15 seconds...after about 6 seconds, I heard an awful noise...something that reminded me of a scifi movie...I looked around and saw huge sparks in the microwave and then BOOM 4 holes in the window of the microwave.  At that moment I realized that the little mixing bowl was metal.

4. For some reason I CAN'T make muffins from the muffin mix that you just add milk to...THEY BURN TO A CRISP. No matter what I do...they burn. They hate me.

5. Our first "fight" happened in Knoxville, TN.  After we checked into the hotel, we decided to find the mall.  We plugged the address into the GPS and away we went.  40 minutes later we still weren't there and Tyler was missing exits because the GPS was hateful.  Needless to say, Tyler wasn't a very happy husband.  I was trying my best to keep positive and be encouraging...but before long both of us were in BAD moods.  We finally got to the mall...go in and shop...come out...get to our car...look over...and guess what we saw?  Our hotel sign.  If we had just gone left instead of right when we pulled out of our hotel, it would have literally taken us 5 minutes or less to get to the mall. hahaha.

Anyway, those are just a few things that have happened.  I know there will be many more memories made and many more things to learn.  Can't wait to share them with you!