8.13.2012

the claw of satan

It's that time of year again!
The butt length mullets,
the massive boobage,
the booty shorts,,
the smell of BO, animal poop, and freshly made cinnamon rolls.
That's right y'all.
The good ole' State Fair of West Virginia is in town!
 Every year,
I go at least one time.
50% for the food
 47% to people watch
and 3% because I am a West Virginian...and I enjoy it.
The hubs and I went last night.
My friend Haylee and her fiance went with us.
Haylee and I decided we were going to ride the rides.
You know,
the ones that are assembled in 24 hours and go in constant circular motions?
I was 16 the last time I rode the fair rides,
so I was pretty excited.
Sadly,
the excitement was short-lived.
To my dismay,
something really BAD happened inside my body
during the last 6 years.
When I was 16,
I could ride the rides all day
and it was no big deal.
But. yesterday, as I was spinning at the very top of the "Freak Out"
I quickly realized that I wasn't 16 anymore...
and that I was, in fact, riding the claw of Satan.
I was regretting the 10 pounds of cheesy ribbon fries that I had eaten 10 minutes before.
I was pretty positive that they were about to go from my stomach to the face of the poor, unfortunate 10 year old child sitting beside me.
Luckily I was able to keep my ribbon fries down...
but it was pretty touch and go for awhile.

So let me get this straight.
I go to bed at 830 every night,
I watch antique shows with my hubs (and thoroughly enjoy them),
I have cellulite,
and now I get sick on fair rides.
According to that description
I am an old married granny.
And surprisingly,
I'm okay with that...
because Tyler is my old married grandpa.

Happy Monday!



9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha - this is so wonderful!

Isn't it kind of sad and scary when we realize that our bodies seemingly changed overnight? But you have a good attitude about it, since it makes your hubby an old grandpa, too! :)

K said...

It was so nice running into you! I didn't dare try the rides this year. (or last year for that matter) More important than how fast they go up is how fast they come down!

Tricia said...

The claw of Satan! It looks...relaxing...
Fair season doesn't start for us until late August/September. I'm so excited!

Veronica Lee Burns said...

haha I'm so the same way..getting older by the day...Looks like your fair is lots of fun!

Lauren said...

Ahh I love State Fairs! I am always trying to convince my hubby we should travel to the surrounding states to attend, lol.

Jenny Strickland said...

Yep!!! I made that mistake a few years ago! I thought I could ride all the rides I rode when I was a teenager... BIG MISTAKE!!!... But I soon found out my body was not the same at 25 as it was at 16!

I now just go for the food!!!

jes @ twosmuppies said...

i am already queasy looking at that claw of satan.
i'd blow chunks everywhere. seriously. everywhere. motion sickness and i are NOT friends.

Kasey Lynne said...

"Massive boobage" hahahah that's hilarious! Gotta love people watching at the fair!

Those rides are SO sketchy...I'll never have the guts to actually ride one. I'd like to live to see me turn 30 thank you very much!

Unknown said...

new reader. loving as I read this post & several others. obviously I can relate. lol